Posted by: miilee | January 9, 2010

Color ME!!

All of a sudden, my updateds page on Facebook was showing people changing their statuses to colors. White, Black, Baby pink…. then I got a message from a friend. This is what it read. “Just for fun! Write the color of your bra in your status, nothing else, just the color. Send this message on to only girls, no men. This is to spread the wings of breast cancer awareness. Someone sent it to me, send it to your friends. See how long it takes before the guys wonder why all the girls have colors in their status! Thanks for supporting.”

That explained the colors..!! But some of the guys had also put up statuses that indicated just how many guys knew about it. I felt a little awkward about putting up the colour of my bra on my facebook…..

Then I thought, why not? So without thinking much, I jumped in.


And I went down my updates and started reading all the conversations under each of the colors that had come up. More than half of it was giggling by girls who knew about it and dumbfounded guys asking whatever the hell did we meant by “Santa Red with white dots.”

As I scrolled down and read on and commented, I started enjoying myself. And somewhere deep down, it registered; We are taught to be awkward about our breasts and out under garments. I’ve rarely seen a group of guys hesitating to talk of their personal parts in public. I mean I know those one or two shy guys who’d rather not address their anatomy as casually as all that in public. But when it comes to my girl buddies, more than half of them would hesitate to even say the words, “Breast” or “Vagina” out loud in public.

Why is that? A Guy never thinks twice before using words like “Penis” or any of the large assortment of crude slang words. Then why are we so prudish?

So with a mad, gay abandon, I joined all those girls online in making all those comments and talking in  innuendos and thoroughly enjoyed myself. There. It felt good! To talk of our bras…. Tease someone with a “Colorful”…. write a “Me too!!” on someone’s “Yellow!!” …… “like” someone’s “none!”

Somewhere along, I dropped a reserve that I never knew I had. It was like a cape was taken off of my shoulders and till that moment, I had no clue that I had it on. And it felt great without it!

And maybe this is that same cape that makes me squeamish about going for a mammography or a breast examination or any gynecological thing. This is what keeps so many women from talking of breast cancers and of  fibroids in their uterus.

And it feels good to be rid of it! The “purple” on someone’s status is not just the color of their bra. It is the indication of another of those terrible screens being lifted; One more person who will not shy from a breast exam if she needs to have it at some point. One more person who just declared that I’m comfortable with talking about my body and if you need to talk about breast cancer, I’m here.

I don’t know how much of a purpose it serves, but I sure know that it feels cathartic…. It feels good!Gymnast



  1. aweosme!!!
    it surely feels good to be open abt things like this….n it feels even better when guys get confued n keep asking…whats this alll abt…im getting colourblind…lol….hilarious 😛

    • lol rebecca!!

  2. Well said. Good to know there are people out there looking at it with a more mature perspective.

    • Thanks Amogh… there are superficialities in everything… We have to pick up the relevant threads and move one 🙂

  3. Funny how I say that when my DP is me digging my nose.

    • lol!!!

  4. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Rahul Jauhari, Arun Raveendran. Arun Raveendran said: RT: @realmadrid_rock: The whole bra colour thing today on facebook does have one good thing attached to it : […]

  5. Not on FB. Know of this from tweets.
    If the objective was raising comfort levels of talking about ones own anatomy, I wonder why no declaration of colour was followed by a link to a site that deals with the issue.
    If innuendo was what it took to get women to talk about their private parts, it would have changed the very course of history 🙂

    But your post implies you mean what you said. You’re a rare exception. You did not board the cheap thrills express…

    • there will always be happy riders everywhere. and trust me, innuendos work as conversation points. even as we giggled on the public space, women start talking in private…. not directly, not right away, but somewhere, layers come off and probably a little while later, once the laughter dies down, the ones with the real fears start to feel comfortable to open up and ask for help…

      • Point. Taken.

      • 🙂 i’m glad!

  6. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by arunraveen: RT: @realmadrid_rock: The whole bra colour thing today on facebook does have one good thing attached to it :

  7. u knw all my guy frnds wer arguing over dis… i did put across my argument dat it indirectly helps in spreading awareness… neway u have got it perfectly right……. hatts off girl……. 🙂

    • i’m glad you liked my line of thought fatema. feel free to direct your friends to this post. probably they’ll understand too. but then again, you know, one has to be a woman to know what this thing means… 🙂 so *hugs* and keep reading!

  8. On one level am glad to see that there is at least some positive from the whole thing. I agree that it has made it a little lighter to discuss the whole internal parts thing but I don’t think its here to last. You might be comfortable talking about it one day and maybe a week after that but I honestly doubt it continuing on a longer run.

    On the flipside, I still am disgusted by how it has been termed as a movement to spread Breast Cancer Awareess. It was anything but that. Worst part is that even women saw the funny side to it. There is no funny side to being affected by a life threatening disease.

    Breast Cancer is not part of the fun aspect as has been mentioned part of the chain. If at all, they are two separate concepts and never be mixed. However, sadly here they were.

    • i agree. there is no funny side to anything. but this whole activity did act as a cathartic thing you know…. i don’t talk about my breasts openly. this thing made me. i’m actually a little more comfortable with my body than i was this morning… but i guess you’ll have to be a woman to understand what i mean..

      • Probably. But then again nor do I go out talking about my penis in front of female friends or male friends for that matter. It just depends upon person to person as you clearly pointed out. You didn’t talk about your breasts openly, no one did. You talked about the colour of the bra and that was it. Will it help matters for the future, I certainly doubt it. Maybe am being a bit too negative about it because I still think it was an unnecessary act as breast cancer awareness could have been spread in a different way as well.
        Also, I would like to point out here that breast cancer can affect men too. Not many know that.

      • Ok, i already said; I don’t know if this has helped the cause. I’m just saying that it has helped a lot of us to shrug away inhibitions. and no one spoke about breast cancer on the comments because that is not what you do in a public forum, esp if you have underlying fears. but there were phone calls happening and “will you come with me for a mammography” mails happening all along this time that we started this thing. We don’t need to discuss the info based on breast cancer. we have enough and more of that. we just need to open up and we just need our friends to giggle nervously with and come with us to the clinic. the bra colors were just the starting points. Like opening a window. all of us are ‘aware’ of breast cancer… but none of us admit that we’re worried about it too. this helped.
        and about the first part of your comment, well to every one of a guy like you (that’s decent! thank you!) there are ten who won’t think twice before using words like, “dick head” to address someone in public. It is so common that none of us throw horrified looks at each other when a guy does that. but it registers; it’s casual; no offence meant most of the time. but that is the point; men are casual about their body parts. and for so long, we haven’t been. THAT is why talking of our bras felt good. (but i guess you’ll have to be a woman to understand that 🙂 )

      • (Gosh! I talk a lot, don’t I?)^^

      • I agree this has helped in the open-ness aspect. Men could talk to women about the colour of their bra’s but did a large contingent of them did? I don’t think so. I for one didn’t (well except with my ex gf) . Not that I am nervous or can’t talk about it, it’s just that I didn’t see the whole point behind the discussion. Will it be helpful in the long run? Again my head says no. I wish it would but reality has always been different than what I’ve wanted/expected. I have one question (which since am not a girl/woman, I won’t know about). Do women feel strange talking about their breasts with other women too?

        True. But yeah depends upon the person who says “dick head” in public and then what kind of people is he/she with. I don’t say it because I personally don’t like it and I know my friends won’t either.

        Oh well, we have to agree to disagree I guess.

      • Well, I guess so. But yes, Girls feel shy about talking about their breasts even if it is with their mothers and sisters and girl buddies… THAT is why this helped..

      • Oh! I didn’t know that and its absurd when you can’t even talk about it with your friends and family. This is where not being a girl comes into picture. Nice post Miilee 🙂 (Does your name have two I’s and two E’s?)

      • thanks 🙂 and that’s my pen name… it has two i’s AND two e’s 🙂

      • Oh ok. 🙂

  9. Don’t tell me u r serious about all that your wrote. I mean guys never talk about their private parts with each other. Atleast I haven’t seen that happen in last 25 years of my life, except when they just came to know what it was used for. Plus, when it comes to displaying the color of your bra or whatever, it’s not cool or very bold about girls. It’s pure shamelessness and uselessness.
    Talking about breasts is never a taboo among the guys and girls have their importance only coz they have a good pair of them. But if u start giving out all the info about them to guys, u’ll loose it all… ^^

    • I am really serious abt all that i wrote. It’s all out of personal or close experiences that I’m saying this. Since our childhood we’ve been taught to be ashamed of everything; From having periods to being women. If you call it being shameless, so be it. But anyway, I don’t expect way too many guys to understand it. To each his own 🙂

    • Sorry to respond in between but being a gu, I don’t think what these women did was shamelessness or something to be disgusted about. It takes a lot of courage to put up that colour taking into consideration the amount of perves who would make jokes and comment on it. If telling the colour in a public forum makes them lose their respect then the people who judge them don’t know what it takes to be bold and open about what they actually feel. I have read about taboo’s pertaining to a girl not entering a temple when she is in her periods and that’s shameful, but then again that is not a related topic here.

      • actually, it is a little relevant… it starts with not entering the temple and you really have to be a woman in a hindu family (conservative) to understand the thousand stupid rules women have to follow in cases of family deaths etc…

  10. Very interesting. Continue to place your thoughts and views out there for others. Sometimes men (such as myself) never think much about these things. Being married for 17 years my wife and I don’t talk about that type of stuff unless we know of someone dealing with that particular issue. Thank you.

    • 🙂 thanks for reading.. i hope it helped.

  11. Interesting read. I am a man, I never thought of the awkwardness mentioned. If someone asked, “Doug, what color underwear are you wearing?”

    I’m not, I am wearing a kilt. Or when I am not dressed up fashionably, it would be, “I don’t like underwear, too restrictive.” Both very honest questions, but then again, I am a bit different.

    Again, thanks for writing this thought-provoking piece up.

    Take care, Doug

    • 🙂 lol! thanks for dropping by n reading…

  12. (I don’t see a reply button link up there) Agree its irrelevant but just pointing out the amount of things a girl goes through to that guy. That’s all.

    • that’s fine… 🙂

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