Posted by: miilee | January 15, 2010

My Stupid, Crazy Heart…


I’m a very rational, logical person. I really am. I think carefully before I act, I don’t hold stupid expectations, I believe in results and hard work. I am judgmental and I judge people on their performance and I DON’T believe in Prince Charmings, Mr. Perfects, and Happy Endings.

But I guess it’s a different story with my Heart. Well, My Heart does have her own way, you know. She’s stubborn and very very persistent. She gets in my way when I’m working. When my Brain and I are trying to wade through thick, murky, messy problems with Logic and Reason to help us, She comes along and drags me even deeper into the mess with her puppy faced looks and starry eyes.

Now the thing is, Logic and Reason are old guys and they find it a little difficult to keep their hold on me when Heart plays these tricks and diverts my attention. And Brain, that poor fellow is still too young and inexperienced to be stern with me. Plus, Heart does put all of us in her pocket with one of her very skillfully expressed, “Pleeeeease!!!”. Just one glazed eyed look and all of us make excuses to accommodate her.

And that’s where the problems begin.

She believes in all those ridiculous things which make up dreams. She believes in never-neverland. She believes in the magic of stars. She believes in being watched over by a spirit. Se believes in a Prince charming and waits for him to come on his horse and sweep her off her feet. She believes in happy endings and keeps telling me that there will be one.

And she’s a talker! She tells me of soft music and wine. Of winter nights and warm socks and fireplaces. Of warm arms to cuddle into and a comfortable shoulder to rest my head upon. Of beautiful brown eyes. Of comfort and peace and happiness. Of Happily Ever Afters…….

And I realize that with her talk, she’s taken me into the heart of the messy crap we’d been trying to negotiate ourselves out of. I curse and swear, but somehow, Logic and Reason seem way far away and out of reach and Brain just simply seems to have fallen asleep. And even as the murky mess becomes threatening by the minute, all I do is look into my Heart and wish…. wish for all of it to be true….

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Responses

  1. Miilee, Yep your alive! Welcome to the real world, but in that real world it is great to have all the thoughts and feelings and caring and imagination that life can hold! You did such a good job of describing your feelings! Way to go! You going to write some books? Mona

    • Thanks mona! do share the link if you like…… and yeah, i do plan to write a book at some point…. 🙂

  2. ur feeling r perfect (at tyms i also do feel d same) n nw we jus need 2say “All Izz Well”…………hehe

    • lol!! yeah…. Thanks Michael…!!

  3. this is an exceptional description, i will tell you what caught my attention the most 😉 “Now the thing is…accomodate her.”
    and your style of writing all of a sudden seems so familiar, guess why? well, i would have written it in the shame to shame manner if i ever thought of something like this.
    p.s. if i were you, i’d take it as a compliment! :*

    • Thanks Shraddha! I’m glad you liked it! It sure was a heart- written entry 🙂


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