Posted by: miilee | January 16, 2010

And They Say Counting Sheep Helps…….


It is three in the night. Morning technically, but I guess we call it ‘night’ since it is dark outside and everyone is sleeping.

Well, Everyone, but me….

Not like I didn’t try to sleep. I did! Trust me I did! I made my bed, and lay down, waiting for sleep to come….

then waited some more….

and even more….

still waiting….

Noticed the spot of paint that had chipped off the blade of the ceiling fan….. then realized that I could see it because the light was still on. I couldn’t possible sleep with the light on and if I did, mom would switch ME off in the morning. So got up and switched it off and started to sense my way back to bed.

Stubbed my toe on something in the dark and fell groaning onto my bed…… except the bed was a foot away from where I thought it was…. so I just… fell…

NOT funny!

Hurt my head and elbow, groped around in the dark till I found the bed, got up, made sure that the bed was certainly there and then fell into it. and waited for sleep to come…

Then remembered that I’d have to close my eyes for that to happen, so closed my eyes and waited.

The seconds passed by and sleep didn’t come….

Then minutes….

Have you ever had that funny feeling while playing ‘hide-n-seek’ that when you’re counting with your eyes closed, everyone else has just run away leaving you alone and you, like a fool, are still counting? Well, I started feeling like that. So I opened my eyes because I hate being made a fool of………Then realized that I’d made a fool of myself anyway…..

Then I turned over and thought perhaps counting sheep would help. So I started doing that.

Well, all was fine till No. 20 jumped the fence.

God knows what No.21 was thinking, but he stopped to checkout something at the foot of the fence. No. 22, prancing gaily, did not consider it necessary to open his eyes before jumping and thus ended up diving into No.21’s……. Anyway, both angry sheep started yelling abuses at each other and rolling up their sleeves, very obviously spoiling for a fight.

By then No. 20 came back to check what the noise was about and No. 23, 24 and 25 had started crowding behind.

“Cool it guys!” No. 20 said in a commanding sort of a voice.

“Hey, who in heck are yeh ter tell me ter cool it, huh?” No. 21 sure was an angry hooligan. “This woolbrain ‘ere decides to go up me arse n yeh want me ter cool it, huh?”

” Woolbrains, now Am I? What’s yeh then?” There! I knew No. 22 was no better,” Who wit his head screwed onta da right end of his body stands ogglin’ at a bloody fence? You’re supposed ter leap over da blessed thing, yeh worthless heap ‘o dog poop!”

“N who says so, eh? What if me not wanna leap, huh? What if me wanna stick me arse right on this ground ‘ere and chew straw and sing, huh? Who’s you to stop me, huh?”

Now that had them thinking. They all started scratching their heads and since No. 20 had already jumped across they asked him, “What say, huh dude? What if we fellas here think it’s pretty cool notta jump over?”

“Yeah, what’s if we here thinks the grass on that side is not really all that green huh?”

“Come te think of it, it boggles me li’l mind. Why are we jumpin, I say?” That was ol’ Grandpa No. 41 who’d reached the cluster and figured out what was up.

“er… well….. ” No. 20’s commanding demeanor had come a few notches lower.Β “I dunno……. I guess we’re jumpin so that dame there can get some bit ‘o sleep”

And they all turned to me.

“Is 20 ‘ere being right, missy?” No. 21 glowered at me and I could see a few other angry sheep.

“er…. well…. It’s ok if you guys don’t wanna jump…. no force! It’s all cool!…. Really!!”

“Yeah, tha’ betta be…. ’cause us sheep ‘ere, we take no crap from people, yeh get that right.” No. 21 rumbled.

“Uh-hu” I mumbled.

“So us here will be clearin off ter sumthin better ter do with ourselves.” No. 22 said.

“N if yer so keen ter see things jumpin ova ’em fences, why don’t cha holler ova to ’em cats or ’em dogs? Them be dyin’ ter pleas yeh fellas all da bloody time, anyway…. ” Grandpa 41 suggested over his shoulder….. And they all cleared away.

I thought of 41’s suggestion, but then thought better of it. Sheep are a different ball game all together… Dogs have teeth and I’m sure not up to facing 40 angry indignant dogs…..

So I turned over again…..

And Β heard a growl!!!!

I didn’t ask a dog to jump the fence! I swear!!

But fast on the feet of the thoughts of angry dogs came the realization that it was my stomach making its existence known. I was hungry…… So I got up, and sneaked into the kitchen.

Looked for maggi…… no signs of a pack….. Damn it….. Opened the fridge…… realized that tonight had been the ‘finish left overs’ dinner, so no left overs to feast on….. No milk….. no biscuits…… darn it! even the milk powder was over!

Hell and Damnation…. So I had some water and I swear I heard my stomach abusing….!!!

So, with uncooperative sheep, an essentially bare kitchen, a desperately hungry stomach, no signs of sleep and an abundant stock of abuses for all of them, I’m sitting here, venting my frustration and still waiting….. *sigh*

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Responses

  1. and you sketched this one too??

    • no…. Google zindabaad!!

  2. hehe…..nice 1..i guess nt alwayz things go our way… n wat an awesum sheep fight yaar…..:)

    • yeah…. I’m glad they didn’t attack me… hehehehehe…

  3. The best sides fight ever and what slang man! Super!

    P.s.what if cats jump the fence or even penguins..wouldnt that be fun!

    • lol, yeah. that would be fun… but penguins can’t jump and cats will probably slither from under the fence….. πŸ™‚

      • Hey, thats where the imagination steps in! πŸ˜€

      • lol!! this is fun..!!
        was just wondering why we didn’t think of dolphins jumping hoops….

  4. The article is good and the sketch loks superb:)

    • hey thanks! n da sketch is thanks to google πŸ™‚

  5. I am sure you HAD to be sleepless to get this one! I mean who can imagine Sheeps with a Slang? and what cleverness in having numbers to avoid breaking ur head for names πŸ™‚

    • hehehe… proof of just how bored i was… πŸ™‚


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